The secrets to making parenting fun for you

- So that you can enjoy playing with your kids more

Have you ever felt so mind numbingly bored while playing with your kids, that you wish time would go by so fast? And then you feel guilty because you *should* be having fun with your kids, because all the books and blogs are always listing the benefits of playing with your kids.

Having fun with kids doesn't always come naturally. Especially when you have so many other things you need to fit into your day. But there is a way to make things more fun. In this post I’m going to share the secrets to making parenting fun for you so that you can have more fun with your kids while they’re still young.

So here are the secrets to making parenting more fun with your kids.

1. Get down to their level and really start to try and see what they see

When your kids are dawdling because they want to look at the snails or bees, how about you do a deep dive project into said snails or bees? Photograph them, draw them, cut out pictures and make a file. Research them. I bet you will find some things yourself in this project that you didn’t know before, and that you find interesting. 

There are many things I have recently learned about snails that I had never even thought about in all my years. Like they're born with shells and as they grow their shells grow too. (Then I wanted to know the mechanism of exactly how that happens, but I'm a geek).

2. Plan together

Have a board, or a place on the wall where you can put all your ideas for having fun. A trip to the amusement park, a petting farm, treasure hunt in the forest, a favourite café to eat only cake. Ask your kids to make a list of things they would like to do. 

And then pick one. It can be more exciting if the kids get to choose randomly. You can put all the papers in a bag and have someone pull one out, or have a “pin the tail on the donkey” type of choosing. 

3. Give it a go yourself

When was the last time you had a go on the swings at a park? And swung so high you felt you were on a roller coaster? (And I don't know about you but when my tummy flips over like that it makes me want to giggle). Or the slide (or those little rockers on a spring. I have to say I particularly love these!)

When we get older we tend to think we should act a certain way. And if we don’t act as expected, we get tutting and disapproving looks from others. But you can bet your life that they’re not having fun themselves. So ignore them and just go for it! Don't give a stuff what other people are thinking because it's YOUR turn on the swing now. And you can bet that secretly, a lot of them are wishing they were also having as much fun as you!

4. Pick activities you enjoy 

What did you enjoy playing with as a kid? Want a trip down memory lane? Any chance your kids would enjoy playing with the same things you did? (Try them). 

For me it was playmobil. I absolutely love playmobil! So I bought some sets and suggested them to relatives for kids’ presents (in the themes my kids would most enjoy of course). I found if I just started playing and setting out/ putting together the sets and people, my kids would be curious and come and join in. 

Or what about sewing? What do your kids like - bags? Cuddly toys? Could you help them create those? So have a think about it. Try out your kids with something you enjoy.

5. Set an example of appreciating self care

You need a break. In fact several breaks during the day. It’s tiring looking after small people who have lots of energy, not to mention all the other things you have to fit in a day, besides making sure they don’t hurt themselves or go hungry.

You can’t refill your energy without making the effort to do so. Plus, you want your kids to learn that it’s important that they take care of themselves when they're older, so they don’t always put themselves last. 

So what can you do during the day to refill your energy? Have a quick 10 min with a cup of tea and a book? Yoga? Exercise? (there are ways of working out how to do this with small kids, even if you’re alone all day). Listen to some music? What gives you more energy? Make a list. And explain to your kids what you are doing and why. They might want to join in, or they might ignore you. But get them used to you taking breaks to fill up your energy.

6. Make chores fun too

Yes, you absolutely can find a way to do this. Put on some music and have a tidying up party! Or dance while cleaning up the kitchen. Get your kids to join in too.

What really makes a difference for me is watching a movie while I’m folding laundry. Choose one your kids will enjoy too while they help you. Or use that time to chat about things in school or with their friends, or about one of their hobbies. 

In fact, always, always add an element of enjoyment to chores so you don’t get that sinking feeling when you think of doing it. Or that “have to” feeling of doing something you hate before you’re able to have fun. Make it all fun!

7. Don’t add more to your plate, swap out more fun stuff for less fun stuff

You have a limited amount of time each week, and it would be crazy to try to add to all the things you “need” to do. So, let’s take some away so you actually feel you have time for fun!

Make a list of everything that NEEDS to be done in a week. And I mean needs to be done, not “would like to get done”. Is there anything here you can pass off to someone else? Or get others to help you? Children are more capable than we give them credit for. And if you make the chores fun (see No. 6), it makes it so much easier to get them done without complaint.

Now make a list of all the things you would like to get done in a week and pick just a few of them. Make sure you leave time for you to be able to refill your energy (No. 5), and have fun with your kids. 

8. Block off time

We often feel so guilty about not tidying, cleaning, or cooking that we tell ourselves that “we don’t have time to play with our kids”. And then of course we feel guilty about that too. 

So instead of feeling all that guilt (that quite frankly will kill off any idea of fun), block off sections of time for chores, play, checking emails, time for you etc. And during that, say 30 minute block, just go for it and don’t think about the other stuff so you won’t feel guilty that you’re doing something else than you *should* be doing.

And if you involve your kids in this planning, and they know what is coming up next, they will be more accepting of it. Leaving you free to enjoy playing with them, and have fun without feeling guilty.

9. Feel free to try out your kids’ crazy ideas

Ok, as long as it’s not a dangerous idea. But having said that, give them full permission to try out any crazy idea. Or perhaps you can contribute yourself with crazy ideas? What about a back-to-front dinner? Start with dessert. Or do experiments with candy (two winners in our house even though it means the candy doesn’t actually get eaten). 

We often restrict kids so much and put limits on their behaviour. So occasionally just let them go and watch their imaginations go wild. And if that’s not fun, I don’t know what is!

10. Have a special treat day

I have a child who loves sushi, spas and yoga. Throw in a massage and you’ve got my ultimate dream day! So why not treat ourselves while someone looks after the other kids, and then swap kids.

Another of my kids loves dinosaurs. That’s about all he likes. Not exactly my ideal day, but we make it fun by going to a place that has dinosaur skeletons and having a nice lunch at one of my favourite restaurants. 

You can always make things more fun with your kids. Getting into a different mindset is important. Instead of thinking "this isn't fun for me", ask yourself "how can I make this fun for me too?" And just go for it! Don't give a stuff what the other parents at the park are thinking because it's YOUR turn on the swing now, and they're the ones not having fun ;)

If you want more ideas on how to have fun with your kids while they're still small, come join our Calm Fun Parents Facebook group.